This week I one of my students had her baby. I am excited for her. I have known this girl for 4 years. I got phone calls from her when she moved to Detroit and then to Pontiac. She was excited to be back this fall. She is good kid. She has a lot of potential. Her daughter is going to be blessed by having her as a mom. I like this kid.
Yes, she is a kid and now she has a kid. It is not the best situation, but it is what it is.
I have had students every year I have taught that have been pregnant, given birth during the school year, and/or already have little ones. I have students whose parents are my age. (This year I had a student call me "papa". I told him that I am not old enough to be his papa. His reply let me know I am older than his mom. It was hard for me to keep my jaw from dropping. I also had a student try to set me up with her mom.) This isn't ideal, but it is.
I have been tormented by this since I began teaching. My first year teaching 10 graders I had a student tell me that she was pregnant. She was looking for guidance and I had very little to offer. The following year I had a 9th grader that gave birth to her son just before Thanksgiving. The next year a girl almost couldn't graduate because she missed so much school taking her son to the doctors (while a football player missed more school and had everyone advocating for him). A few years ago I knew of 2 girls that didn't graduate because they were pregnant. One of them graduated from that group from the alternative program - I was so happy for her. This year I have had a pregnant student in each class - 4 classes, 4 girls - that will give birth before they graduate.
My heart breaks for these girls and their kids. I think most of them know how difficult their lives will be. Most of them were (are) raised in similar circumstances. My heart breaks even more. I know that in a few more years I will see the kids of my students. My heart will break for them. These kids are not doomed, far from it. Some of the most successful students I know come from this type background. Still, my heart breaks for them.
So back to the present situation... the student who gave birth to her beautiful daughter on Monday came into school today. She came in because next week is exam week. She wanted to know when and how she could take her exam. I told her that I was going to freeze her grade as of last Friday and that I would excuse her exam. Her response was that she wished the other teachers would do the same thing.
Why aren't the other teachers like that? Do they feel the need to punish this girl for her choices? Are they trying to make her more responsible by forcing her to take her exam?
My heart is broken for this new mom and her precious daughter. Good luck ladies, may you find the support and love you need.
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